26 quotes
American poet (1902–1971)
“To keep your marriage brimming, With love in the loving cup, Whenever you're wrong, admit it; Whenever you're right, shut up.”
"There is only one way to achieve happiness on this terrestrial ball, and that is to have either a clear conscience or none at all."
on Happiness
"If you don't want to work you have to work to earn enough money so that you won't have to work."
on Work
"Middle age is when you're sitting at home on a Saturday night and the telephone rings and you hope it isn't for you."
on Humor
"Where there is a monster, there is a miracle."
on Philosophy
"You are only young once, but you can stay immature indefinitely."
on Life
"Certainly there are things in life that money can't buy, but it's very funny - Did you ever try buying them without money?"
"Middle age is when you've met so many people that every new person you meet reminds you of someone else."
on Relationships
"Parents were invented to make children happy by giving them something to ignore."
"Certainly there are things in life that money can’t buy, but it’s very funny – Did you ever try buying them without money."
"The only incurable troubles of the rich are the troubles that money can't cure."
on Wisdom
"He who has never tasted jail Lives well within the legal pale, While he who's served a heavy sentence Renews the racket, not repentance."
on Justice
"Progress might have been all right once but it's gone on too long."
"Purity is obscurity."
"Never befriend the oppressed unless you are prepared to take on the oppressor."
"Middle age is when you have met so many people that every new person you meet reminds you of someone else and usually is."
"Senescence begins And middle age ends The day your descendants Outnumber your friends."
"Middle age: when you're sitting at home on Saturday night and the telephone rings and you hope it isn't for you."
"Happiness is having a scratch for every itch."
"Candy is dandy, but liquor is quicker."
"Marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays and the other who never forgets them."
