“There cannot be a crisis next week. My schedule is already full.”
More from Henry Kissinger on Humor
“The illegal we do immediately. The unconstitutional takes a little longer.”
“90% of the politicians give the other 10% a bad reputation.”
“The nice thing about being a celebrity is that when you bore people they think it's their fault.”
“The nice thing about being a celebrity is that, if you bore people, they think it's their fault.”
“Ninety percent of the politicians give the other ten percent a bad reputation.”
“Nobody will ever win the battle of the sexes. There is too much fraternizing with the enemy.”
Others on Humor
Groucho Marx
23 quotes“A child of five could understand this. Send someone to fetch a child of five.”
George Carlin
13 quotes“I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, 'Where's the self-help section?' She said if she told me, it would defea...”
H. L. Mencken
11 quotes“Historian: an unsuccessful novelist.”
Sir Winston Churchill
10 quotes“In the course of my life, I have often had to eat my words, and I must confess that I have always found it a wholesome d...”
Ambrose Bierce
10 quotes“TELEPHONE n. An invention of the devil which abrogates some of the advantages of making a disagreeable person keep his d...”
Mary West
9 quotes“To err is human - but it feels divine.”
Douglas Adams
9 quotes“Insanity is a gradual process - don't rush it.”
Laurence Peter
9 quotes“Equal opportunity means everyone will have a fair chance at being incompetent.”
Will Rogers
8 quotes“The minute you read something that you can't understand, you can almost be sure that it was drawn up by a lawyer.”
Dorothy Parker
8 quotes“The best way to keep children home is to make the home atmosphere pleasant - and let the air out of the tires.”
Rodney Dangerfield
7 quotes“You gotta look out for number one, but don't step in number two!”
Ronald Reagan
6 quotes“You can tell a lot about a fellow's character by his way of eating jellybeans.”